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Contributed by John Sammon
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Wednesday, 18 January 2006 (read 1707 times) |
I predict Pat Robertson and Ray Nagin will go on a homosexual date.
Hey! Hey! If they can say crazy things…I can too!
Pat Robertson is the television guru of the 700 Club, a crusader
of the extremist evangelist sect, who routinely puts his foot in his mouth
with insane statements.
When he isn’t doing that, he flat out lies.
I think he’s a Republican.
He made headlines for saying that a Pennsylvania town would suffer
God’s wrath, some kind of Biblical type cataclysm (plague of locusts or
such), because its school board rejected creationist teaching that says
this complex world could only have come about because of divine (God’s)
intervention.
 Instead, the school board opted to teach good old fashioned evolution, and thus incurred Robertson‘s tirade.
Determined to outdo himself, Pat next said the prime minister of Israel
suffered a stroke because God was mad at him for giving land away to
Palestinians. The irony, of course, is that some of it was already
their land thirty centuries ago.
This caused such an uproar worldwide, that Pat got in real trouble, and had to apologize.
Who knows what Pat will say next?
Perhaps he will say nothing ever works out the way George Bush wants
because Bush made God mad when he once donned a leather Goth suit at a
punk party.
Nagin is the mayor of New Orleans.
Nagin said this week God caused Hurricane Katrina to hit the town
because he (God. God’s a man, right?) is mad at the US, and black folks
in general. Nagin is black, and a Democrat.
Expanding on this enlightened theory, Nagin continued the nausea by
saying that God is angry with blacks because they are robbing and
killing each other.
In other words, God in his infinite wisdom, decided to punish even tiny
black three-year-old toddlers, forcing them out of their homes…because
of the misdeeds of some adult thugs.
It couldn’t possibly be a result of a moron…a white man…laying out a
town in 1710 in an alluvial, below-sea-level, swamp-infested flood
plain right next to the Gulf.
It couldn’t possibly be that.
It’s God!
So he (God) sent a storm to chastise them, the people….all of them.
Even the elderly in their rest homes. All of them. Even plain ole’ hard
workin,’ God fearin’ folk who pay their bills….and straighten their
kid’s teeth with braces, and who play by the rules.
“He (God) is upset at Black America,” Nagin said. “We’re not taking care of ourselves.”
Does this mean God is mad at Bill Cosby too?
My question is, why won’t God take care of Nagin? Or Pat? Or Michael Jackson?
Isn’t it fun to find out that influential, overpaid people are a bunch of fanatics?
I predict Robertson and Nagin will experience the joys of homosexual love…together.
Don’t get me wrong. I’m not saying they’re sissy.
Homosexual men are often anything but weak. Some can toss a piano right
out a window. Of course, that doesn’t mean I’ve known such people
myself, intimately. Personally, I prefer women. Men are too loud,
sweaty, bony, and hairy.
If I decided to give up women…..it would have to be with a man who was sensitive, caring, and soft, effeminate.
A blonde guy. With a nice haircut. No facial hair (beard). A Scorpio.
No macho types.
Nagin and Robertson truly deserve each other.
© Copyright 2006 by SammonSays.com. Reprinted with permission.
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