Little man with cheeks of tan.  You lie like the grease in a frying pan.

George Bush's press conference last week was a masterpiece of deceit and hand wringing self pity, that for a brief moment made him more likeable. It's so pitiful, I almost feel sorry for him.

Remember back in the heady days of arrogance when he derisively described and dismissed protesters against the Iraq War as a "focal group?" How things have changed. Bush finally admitted Iraq had nothing to do with 9-11, even though his vainglorious vice president still insists it did.

Little man!

Can you believe this? Bush said he wouldn't question the patriotism of anyone who disagreed with him. Are you mad? Have you gone insane? This after the worst smearing since the McCarthy era witch hunt days of the 1950s, with Bush and his cronies calling anyone who disagreed with them disloyal, bad Americans.

His vice president still says any disagreement means you're in league with Al-Qaeda.

Bush sheepishly admitted things in Iraq haven't worked out very well. The American people still listen to him. Bush is trying to appear reasonable to try and save his war and his ass. Where's the arrogance, the posturing, the posing in flight uniforms from a former National Guard boy who skipped meetings, the strutting around like a crow in the gutter?

Mistakes were made? That's what he (Bush) said. Mistakes? Mistakes?

We attack a country based on false intelligence that they had exotic weapons and divert all our attention there, and then let two other countries (North Korea and Iran) develop such weapons.

Little man!

The moment of truth in the press conference came when Bush said that as long as he's president, nothing will change. That's the key. As long as he's president. As long as he's president.

My country, right or wrong. Right George?

We've killed two thousand American servicemen and fifty thousand Iraqis, a genocide all our own worthy of Saddam himself. Because our leaders were reckless and stupid.

When little George is chagrined, he's more charming. More human. Where's the pompous little man?

You're going down the drain over this. All of you. You didn't listen to your generals. You didn't order body armor for the troops. You let the Katrina victims sit there in the super dome and starve.

You're all going down.

Call another press conference George. Tell everybody how you meant things to be different, how you're misunderstood. About how you haven't been given a fair chance. You've already compared yourself to Harry Truman, saying he was unpopular during his presidency, but now today we think Truman's great.

Don't stop there George. Compare yourself to Joan of Arc. The difference between you and Joan is that she actually saw combat.

Little man! Shuffle your papers at your desk and tell yourself they'll see. I'll show 'em.

Feel sorry for yourself. You and Cheney.

It's such a tough job George.

©2006, SammonSays.com. Reprinted with permission.