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RIAA Operatives Eliminate Osama bin Ladin |
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Contributed by Tyrone Mercer
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Wednesday, 31 January 2007 (read 6024 times) |
LOS ANGELES - Nameless suits at Recording Industry Association of America Central Command told reporters at a hastily called press conference that they had killed the world's most notorious terrorist.
 RIAA Spokesbot announces the good news to reporters.
"Sadly, moments after the strike, Canadian YouTube operatives were reported in the area picking up scraps. We anticipate a secondary strike of Class Action Cluster bombs should take care of the problem"
A spokesdrone for the Canadian YouTubers denied operations in AfPakiGhanistan saying, "it's like, hockey season eh? We're not leaving the hoose until Joon. So Take off eh?"
At FBI HQ, Special Agent Ted Tedders told a group of visiting tourists that while the FBI in no way approves of vigilante justice, there shouldn't be any shock or awe in the effectiveness of the RIAA's operation. “The RIAA is better at finding people than a priest hunting a virginal 15 year old in rural Minnesota. Add to that the fact that, unlike the priest, they're completely sober and you have a very effective fighting force.”
Wall Street, closed at the time of the action could not be reached for comment. Witnesses say the Street was out at Maxim's playing FTSE with the Hang Seng.
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